In this metropolitan city, where technological advancement has made life easier than before, there are a considerable number of people drowning in self-pity. Those who are often complaining about their underlying failure or lack of access to opportunity. Constantly blaming the poor stars under which they were born.
I was the same.
Each day I would submit myself to drowsiness. Complaining. Criticising. Full of negativity. Destroying myself in an everlasting conundrum of self pity.
I barely had anything to celebrate; only complaints. The limited friends of mine would find me emotionally exhausting to be around. While erstwhile charm faded into toxicity.
Those who knew me would see me as wallowing in self pity. They would find me difficult to tolerate because of my negative attitude (primarily due to my shitty jokes). I have had enough pity for myself already.
But why did I submit myself to unhappiness?
Why do we all submit to drowsiness?
Why do PEOPLE SEEK SYMPATHY from the outside?
Life can be hard at times. So can be people’s childhood and the experiences therein, which makes them seek support from outside. However, that wasn’t the case with me.
Despite having had a happy childhood, I got trapped in the ocean of negativity. I had this constant urge to be happy and to keep others happy I needed to please them, overlooking my own tank.
This is a common issue with many, where the constant depletion of energy owing to negative surrounding leads to a negative process.
The people drowning themselves in self pity are going through a similar phase in life. Their conversations revolve around various aches, losses, disappointments, and failures. Everyday encounter with them is either doom and gloom, or a bit of wailing. An outer appearance makes us believe that they are unhappy, primarily because they feel the urge to seek support and constant sympathizing to fill their depleting tank.
These people are often mistaken with corporate sympathy seekers or pleader of bad news. One of the reasons for their self inflicted harm is unhappiness and the negative experience. At times also causing depression.
For instance, I quote my case, I understood that unhappiness too was a state of mind, which can be a result of various factors. I decided to secure a happy memory inside, a memory that gives us everlasting joy. While self pitying is a habit of complaining of failures or an inability which does not exist in reality, I would merely close my eyes to recall that joy. Instantly bringing a smile upon my face.
Slowly, I could seek happiness from minimalist wonders of nature. Whether it be an ant dragging down her food, or a baby wallowing (I am yet to work on my fear of snakes and depth).
Things changed. I stopped pleasing others. I did what made me happy and my happiness spread positivity around.
As for the sympathy seekers, I never had sympathy to spare but plentiful of empathy.
Rejoice life. Rejoice the day. Look ahead, happiness is within you. Secure a positive memory that you cherish and recall it. Develop it.
It will become your meditation factor and a source of constant happiness.